Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Day 8 colors

My favorite color for Skylar is purple, it always reminds me of her, Also especially for her we loved the damask print print and pink. We have a blanket that was that coor made for her.

When Skylar was stillborn I got in contact with the wonderful lady who made her blanke. She made us a another one to match. She will never know how much this meant to us. She is on etsy and her shop is called bugaboo baby.  I will again say on her thank you do much for Skylar's special blanket.

Day 7

Where am I now with my grief.

I feel in the middle,  somedays I am good others bad. It does hit me more with having our rainbow daughter. I can see sometimes all the things Shelby can do that Skylar never got the chance to do.

Yet we will always love them separately and not to always see one for the other. I always picture holding two girls.

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Day 6 Rituals

The only real ritual we have with Skylar is to go and visit her when we are near her spot. Wetry to bring balloon or flowers. We are going to send her balloon on her birthday and on the 18th of the month either visit her or send a balloon to her.

Day 5 Memory

My greatest memory of Skylar when she was born.

I remember the nurse around me crying and my husband on my right side. When she was born I asked the doctor to put her on my bare chest. I don't know if I asked or just patted my chest meaning I wanted her on me.mi remember our midwife Msrcia saying I wanted her chest to chest. I can still feel her warm body in my arms and how heavy she was.

Friday, October 4, 2013

Day 4

Skylar's legacy she left behind was, she thought me to love more, enjoy evey moment. You never know when it can be taken away.

I love twice on everything, one for me and one for Skylar.

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Day 3 Myths

One of the biggest mthys on infant loss for me is.

You have other children,

Yes we do but that in no way can replace Skylar. She is a different person than our other children are. She would have had different intrest, friends and personality. I always wonder what she may have become. She would have been 16 months right now. I have no idea what a 16 month old would be doing.

We will always treasure our beautiful girl now and forever, just as we treasure our 7 other children.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Day 2

How our daughter got her name.

My pregnancy with Skylar was very different than my other 4 boy pregnancy,  I was a little more sicker with my girls than boys.

I always knew I would have a baby named Skylar. Our older girls have S names so it was only fitting all our girls will have S names.

We never really knew till Skylar was that she was for sure a girl. Our early ultrasounds and even 18 week ultrasound the midwife was not totally sure she was a girl. She said she saw no boy parts but it did not mean they were not there. Another ultrasound after the 18 week one showed our m9aybe girl still. Even at the hospital when they checked to see if she had was gone did not show because of her position.

We always loved the name Skylar I found the name Skylar means shelter. She was always sheltered so that makes me feel good. Her middle name came from my aunt Betty Jean who passed away at 18 in a car accident in May of 1974, Now she holds our Skylar Jean tillwe can all be together again. Also her Grandpa Wyatt holds her too.

Capture your grief Day 1

Since my picture is unwilling to cooperate I am going to tell about my pictur. It was of my black and white cat with our orange pumpkin.  Not excatly a sunrise but meaning ful all the same.