Thursday, August 9, 2012

Her Carseat

Yesterday I saw her carseat.

No, Not the one that sits in the closet unused waiting for someone to fill it with a lovable baby. This was the same carseat, with a baby that looked to be the same age as Skylar. Guess What?

 The  baby in the same carseat was the same age as Skylar's would have been. 3 months!

 How is this fair, I see the little sweet bundle that is this couples baby. Sitting there waving his little fist in the air, So little, so cute. It is hard to imagine Skylar would be just like that also. Just bigger than that little boy. I am glad the baby in there was a boy, If it was a girl I would have felt worse, I still got anxiety seeing this baby. I wish I did not get this way when I see babies. I want to be happy when I see them not want to run in the other direction. I just want my daughter back, I know God does not hate us and only has love for us. It just is hard to see babies Skylar's age and not have her here.

I found out today my ob wants me to wait at least 3 months before getting pregnant. Well I guess that is not that bad it will 3 months postpartum on August 18. I just want another baby to love. I will always love Skylar and nothing will change that. For me a another baby would bring me a little peace instead of always crying when I see newborns.

I just have to put everything in God's hands.

1 comment:

  1. Hi hun,

    Thanks for stopping by my blog and taking the time to read and comment. I really love finding new mummies to reach out to and share with.

    I know this feeling all too well. Seeing babies of the same age, or with the same things. It's just always constant reminders, isn't it?

    I would love another baby too, but I know that now isn't the time for me either. I had a csection and a bad hemorrhage, so they've asked me to wait. It's been over 4.5 months now. Far too long.

    I hope that you are able to conceive quickly when you do start trying. I've heard that it doesn't make you miss your angel any less, but it does help to bring you hope and happiness again.

    Lots of love,