It has been almost 8 weeks since Skylar was born. To imagine I would have a 2 month old would be a blessing. It has been a long hard road, Some days I feel okay and other's I can feel the pain when I first get up.
I did have one great dream of Skylar, I was holding her head in my hands and just looking at her. I know this is her way of letting me know she is with me and is okay. I truly wish she was here with us though. I know she is with Jesus and he is taking care of her till the day we get to be with her again.
I love looking at Skylar's pictures, She is a beautiful baby. I also got to talk to another angel Mom, It feels good to connect with other Mom's who have been where I am. I just wish we all did not have to go down this road yet we do and have no choice in the matter which is the hardest part to live with.
I went to my 6 week Postpartum check up and I found out some more about the placenta abruption. I found out there was no reason why it abrupted they way it did. No infection and her cord was the right length. I don't know if this makes it easier or harder to live with. I also was told I can have more children when we want to. I know this was a major concern of mine and I am sure anyone who has lost a child to this also wonders the same thing.
I am going to give my fears and concerns to God and he will help me with them and I have to stop looking at all the negative things and remember that everything is in God's hands and not mine. I will look to him for the answers and he will be there for us.